Funny Facebook Status

123status.com provides a huge collection of FREE Funny Facebook Statuses and
 Funny Quotes.These are the coolest, amazing and lovable statuses  different
 from the other.

1. A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A
   successful   woman is one who can find such a man.

2. In d chase between cat n rat, d rat mostly wins, because d cat is running
   for its food n rat for its life. Purpose is more important than need.

3. A friend doesn’t go on a diet because you are fat.

4. All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height.

5. Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

6. I am the only person who doesnot care that Its a Shark Week.

7. They say couples should never go to bed angry. That?s why married people
   always look  so tired.

8. I hate weddings. old people would poke me saying You’re next. They stopped
   when I started going up to them at funerals and poking them, saying, You’re next.

9. ‘-‘   nope ._.  um   ._.  not here   ‘-‘  not there   ._. what did I do with it   ‘-‘ hm.
   That?s strange.Where did my give a @!$%# button go?!

10. Some people come into our lives and leave footprints on our hearts. Others come into
    our lives and make us want to leave footprints on their faces!

11. Women now have choices. They can be married, not married, have a job, not
    have a job, be married with children, unmarried with children. Men have the
    same choice we?ve always had: work or prison.

12.  33% of married women say their pet is a better listener than their husband. And
    100% of pets say this crazy bitch won’t shut up.

13. I will never go bungee jumping. A rubber breaking was the reason I was born,
    it sure as   hell isn?t going to be the reason that I die.

14. I have a temper so don’t let my pretty face fool you!

15. Money – not evil, evil does not end so quickly.

16.  I want to make a Facebook account and the name will be Nobody so when
     I see  stupid crap people post, I can Like it. And it will say Nobody Likes This.

17. How come Mario can smash through bricks, yet he dies when he touches
    a freakin turtle?

18. Roses are red, violets are blue, friend requests are exciting..
    but who the hell are you?!

19. If a status is really good you will read it
    twice if a status is really good you will read it twice.

20. Oh I am sorry… I didn’t realise you were giving me a dirty look?
      I just thought you were ugly like that all the time.

     For more Funny  Facebook statuses please visit http://www.123status.com/status/funny .

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About sharmakamal

I am kamal sharma.I graduated from AMITY university, Delhi which is among the top five universities.Singing and Swimming in the spare time are my favorite.
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